Posts Tagged ‘sad’


they call me fat
make me feel ashamed
ashamed to eat
ashamed to enjoy food
ashamed to go out
ashamed to be seen
ashamed to look at
my reflection in the mirror
ashamed to think
ashamed to breath
ashamed to be human
ashamed to be me
being ashamed has
become my identity
i am not human anymore
i only exist so
others can mock me
force me to stop inside
and eat more and more
exacerbating the problem
completing the circle of
problem, abuse, shame
a vicious circle
that consumes me
a vicious circle
that i cannot escape


my home is a shipping container
metal, long, dark
i’m told it’s temporary
however long temporary is
small and cramped
it has a door and
window at one end
too hot in summer
too cold in winter
people fight outside
i stay in and
read a book,
play board games,
listen to the radio
on the TV everyone
has cars, houses
X-boxes, computers and TV’s
somewhere to live
somewhere to call home
i would be happy
with a bed to myself
in a room of my own
i don’t want much
but the little i
want seems far away
at least right now


when i am inside

you are my comfort

my warmth, my softness

changing shape as i move

moulding yourself to my every mood

 

but when i go outside

you come with me in my mind

the thought of you keeps me safe

how you turn cold into warmth

hardness into soft, sad to happy

 

you encompass all my joy

you soak up all my emotions

you bring my dreams to life

you are my best friend

you are my mobile pillow