Posts Tagged ‘memory’


i’m asked a question
and my mind goes blank
like a painters canvas.
there is nothing there.
I feel as if I am living
a breathing death, frozen
to the spot, unable to think
or speak or move, terrified
as I try to process what is
happening to me, a vision of
my future that is more
frightening than any
dystopian vision I know, a
vision of never remembering
my past, my friends, my life,
a mind of blank canvases going
through motions that don’t
register. I am so scared.


You have been with me
Twenty seven years or more
The finest cut a man ever made
Sometimes you hide from me
And I search for you slowly
To remind me of the then
And now, today, tomorrow
All my yesterdays
Perfectly put together
Like a fine glass sculpture
Nobody knows what you conceal
Days lost forever
Youth I will never get back
Memories unable to recall
But for the searing knife
Burning through flesh and organs
Moving silently, unseen, untouched
No scars remain
Except the memory of a
Deep, powerful, intense pain
As I watch every second
Drip slowly into me
The torture of water
Only the colour changes
Reminding me of time passing
Fine steel tips deep in my body
Life flows through them
Swelling my veins
Eyes kept open
That cannot see the scars of
Knives and needles
But remember the scars of
Pain and sickness
That never dim with time


I said goodbye to this tall, slender, memory

From my past that had from nowhere

Come back into my life, rekindling teenage desires

Unexpected but welcome, a distraction from daily life

 

And now this vessel of pure white skin, topped with

Fair, blonde hair, cascading down towards mother earth

Covering pure, delicate bone. So light yet so strong

Stood before me, so close, I could smell her lipstick

On my tongue as we stood burning each others image

 

Into the deepness of our memories, ready to be

Recalled when we awoke in the early hours of a

Summers morning, the sun peering over the horizon

Getting ready to wake up unsuspecting men and women.

 

Her fingers left mine, hanging nowhere, just there

As we said goodbye forever, knowing this would be the

Last time we saw each other, touched each other, tasted each other…

 

I turned and touched a single, lonely bead of sweat

Resting on the pillow before it melted into soft fabric

Gone forever, never coming back

The smell of lavender hanging in the air

Reminding me of the night before…

 

I gather the bead of sweat, so soft, so light, so clear

On the tip of my forefinger, look at it taking in

The colours of the world bouncing away in all directions

Before I place it gently on the tip of my tongue

And take a last taste of you, my last memory of you

As I say goodbye to you, forever