Archive for September 16, 2015

the handsome lying bastard

promised me the world

in his smooth Irish drawl

he drenched me in dribble

whispering in my ear bibble, bibble

a show on Broadway

a stroll round Central Park

back to the hotel on 5th Avenue

for a night of love and romance

it sounded so perfect…

instead we ended up

in an Irish bar listening

to a band called the Pogues on Us

and some bloke who fancied himself

as Seamus Heaney

he enjoyed the craic with his mates

me, i stared at the remains

of a cheap whisky

lingering in the corner of my glass

fairytale of New York?

more like an empire of nightmares

nachos, nachos everywhere

all I can do is sit and stare

red bits, green bits, something cheesy

i’ve eaten too much, I feel queasy

it’s not a battle it’s a war

i can feel my stomach begin to soar

up towards the sky so bright

oh f**k i need a bloody sh**e!

oh no i don’t, but somethings starting

this is going to be a night of smelly farting

all this food , the diets gone

all the weight has come back on

i need to go for a very long run

before the weight stays on my bum